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To Cum or Not to Cum: When to Let Go & Hold Back for The Best Sex

Want to blow your partner’s mind with the best sex of their life? The kind that leaves them trembling for days, with their body aching in the most delicious way—and every time they think about that night, they can’t help but get dripping wet. But then again, you also have this intense fear in the back of your mind of nutting too soon and missing out on all the fun, or even worse, losing control and finishing even before things start heating up.

Well, then this guide is exactly what you need. If you’re ready to dominate the bedroom and show your partner who’s in charge, the secret lies in mastering the art of timing. Tease them just enough to drive them wild, before holding back and making them beg for more, and then, when the moment is right, give them those earth-shattering orgasms they’ll never forget.

Let’s get you there. 

1. The Thrill of Edging

Edging is the ultimate form of orgasmic control, where you take teasing right to the brink of climax—only to pull back and keep that thrilling build-up going. It’s the skill of riding the edge of release, prolonging the pleasure to create a mind-blowing finish.

But don’t confuse edging with the usual orgasm that hits like a freight train and leaves you spent. Oh no, the kind of orgasm edging brings is way more intense—think uncontrollable full-body spasms, waves of pleasure crashing over you as every nerve in your body lights up.

Here’s how it works: you or your partner stimulate yourself until you’re just about to explode, then stop right before you reach that peak. The sensation simmers under the surface, teasing you as you resist the urge to let go. After you’ve calmed down just enough, you start again, repeating the process as many times as you dare.

The best part? The more you edge, the more tension builds, turning your eventual release into the best toe-curling experience. By the time you finally cum, the pleasure will be so intense you’ll wonder why you never gave edging a chance. Imagine it like a rollercoaster: the longer you wait, the higher the drop—and the more exhilarating the ride.

2. How to Hold Back in Bed?

For women, multiple orgasms are a thrilling ride when it comes to having the best sex, but for men, finishing too soon can feel like a disaster waiting to happen. Premature ejaculation can leave you feeling frustrated and insecure, potentially shaking your confidence in the bedroom. But don’t worry—if you want to last longer during sex and aren’t facing any medical issues, these tips will help you extend the pleasure. Remember, the best sex is often more about what’s going on in your head than what’s happening below the belt.

    • Stay Cool Under Pressure:

Keep your excitement in check and avoid any aggressive or wild sex. When you are calm, you have better control of your erection. 

    •  Take Charge:

Go on top and be the one to guide the action. By controlling the rhythm and pace, you can manage your arousal levels effectively.

  • Shift Your Weight:

Change your position subtly. This can help reduce stimulation on your little guy and give you a moment to regain your composure.

    • Maintain a Steady Pace:

Avoid sudden changes in speed no matter how good it feels for both of you. Consistency is key to holding onto that tantalising edge without losing control.

    • Go Shallow:

Instead of ramming your partner like an excited pornstar, focus on shallow thrusts. Move just a few inches in and out of them to keep your shaft and the connection alive. 

    • Breathe Deeply:

Control your breathing. Slow, deep breaths through your mouth can help you relax and keep excitement from building too quickly.

    • Take Breaks:

Don’t be afraid to take short pauses during sex. Slowing down or stopping for a moment allows you to regain control and prevent the urge to finish too soon. Use this time for kissing, touching, or exploring other areas of your partner’s body. 

    • Think Unsexy Thoughts:

When in doubt, conjure up something utterly mundane to cool you off. Just don’t overdo it or you might lose your erection totally. 

    • Incorporate Toys :

Give your cock a break and bring in some exciting toys! Clit suckers and dildos can enhance foreplay, teasing your partner and adding extra pleasure while you maintain control.

3.The Best Time to Let it Go

There’s a time and place for holding back, but sometimes, letting go is exactly what the moment calls for. When passion is high, and the connection with your partner has reached its peak, submitting to the overwhelming desire can result in a blissful, immediate release that leaves you feeling fully satisfied. Losing control in these moments brings a rush of intense pleasure, reminding you just how good it feels to surrender to your body’s natural urges.

Of course, timing is key. Trust your instincts—if you sense that your partner is about to climax and dive into the depths of pleasure with you, don’t hesitate. Sometimes, the best way to enjoy the best sex is simply to lose yourself in that shared moment of ecstasy. 

As a man, knowing exactly when to let go or hold back can enhance your sexual encounters and leave your partner coming back for more. At Horny.sg, we have a curated selection of adult toys to help you dominate your bedroom. Whether you’re aiming for explosive releases or irresistible build-ups, we have it all. 

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